Dear Mr. Nelson

In your opinion piece this weekend, you said a few things that were wrong.  And I would like to call BS on those things. 

What!?  I would invoke my brother's initials on this, a family blog?  Mr Nelson, I believe the use of my brother's initials is warranted in this case.  I think your errors are harming my son.  

Here is what you said.  

1.  Women are naturally gifted with the ability to nurture [and men aren't].

Liar!  The ability to nurture -- to love and help a child to grow -- is not a male/female trait.  It is a talent that must be developed.  It requires patience, love, and effort, from anyone who wants to develop it -- just like any talent!  Some talents come easier to some people, but men are wonderful caregivers as well as women.  And on the other hand, women are child abusers as well as men.  Stop telling my son that he doesn't have to work to learn how to love and develop relationships with his children.  Stop it!  It is vital that our men learn to nurture in their families as well as our women.  

2.  Because my wife is the better nurturer, my kids always go to her first with their problems.  

Dude.  I am assuming you've held traditional gender roles in your home during the life of your family. That means she's been at home all day every day, while you are away.  She has been around during your children's whole lives to drive them in the car, to talk to them about their school day, to hug them and hand them bandaids.  She has developed relationships with your kids because she has put in the effort to do so, and because she has been there.  They don't go to her because she's female; they go because she's done a good job at her work all these years.  Do the people in your company go to your wife when they have a problem at work?  No.  Do you think that's because you're male?  I don't.  

3.  "It is a cardinal rule of leadership and management that there must be one in charge. That is paramount for any kind of effective functioning."  [And therefore men need to rule at home.]

I call BS.  And why would I bring up my brother's initials again?  Because having one ultimate person in charge doesn't work.  It doesn't work for governments, it doesn't work for business, and it doesn't work for families.  My husband and I are both mature adults, and we are both in charge.  My husband doesn't need me to tell him when to wake up, when to get dressed, which tie to wear to work.  I don't need to tell him where we are going on vacation this year, and when, and how.  When major decisions come up that will affect the whole family, we talk them over together.  I don't tell him that his opinion is nice -- and thank you for it -- but now we will do what I wanted to do in the first place.  For major things that come up, we must be unanimous.  I respect him too much to tell him how it's going to be.  For minor things, we are both responsible.  We take care of daily tasks and chores together.  And we give each other breaks, so one of us doesn't have to run everything all the time.  In my little family, there are two people in charge, and all three of us know it.  

4.  Heavenly father is protecting our Heavenly Mother from her kids by hiding her in a shed somewhere that no one can find her.  Ha!

Those are not actually your choices of words, but that's the gist of your speculation.  What?!  After you just argued that women are naturally better nurturers?  If my husband tried to protect me from my babies in this way, I would have him arrested.  What mother would let her children go off and grow up all alone, while she stayed in the shed, worried that they would call her names during their teenage years?  BS.

Mr Nelson, you should probably just say "I don't know", rather than make up explanations that remind me so much of my brother's initials.  

It's good to practice.  "I don't know."  "I don't know."  "I don't know."