Saturday, September 21, 2019

Some things I've been thinking about

1. How everyone has left this space. Ten years ago, I regularly read several blogs that were important to me. They helped me process my world as a new academic and a relatively new mother, in a heavily religious community. The blogs are still there. No one writes anymore. The people are all gone. The other new mothers, the other women working through their religion and their careers, they're gone. I'm not really around as much myself. I no longer write eleven posts per month. But occasionally something happens to make me look at a post in an archive, and I remember what used to be, and I miss them.

2. Building community. I've especially been thinking about the communities built by religion. The communities offer support, friendship, fellowship, but only to those who become part of the religion wholly. And friendship isn't the only benefit. There are physiological benefits as well, that help us, the human animal, feel rewarded for our sacrifices in the name of community and in the name of religion. It would all be extremely fascinating if it weren't so weird.

3. Work-life balance. Jonathan's school is on my campus, so we take the train together in the morning, and leave for home together about 8.5 hours after arriving. It often feels like we're leaving too early. Like if I spent just one more hour at work, I could finish a whole bunch of little things and keep on top of all my projects. But I've already spent more than an eight hour day at work. There are other things to do besides work all the time. Aren't there? I think there should be....

4. What it means to live a good life. I live with people I love. We are financially stable. I am mostly healthy. I only work 8.5 hour days and the occasional Saturday or Sunday afternoon. I like my job. People like me. Isn't this good enough? What more can you ask for? Where am I going?