Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Concert in the park with loopy parents

Actual excerpts from conversations that occurred between 6:35 pm and 8:30 pm on Monday, August 16, 2010.

The cast of characters: My father, whom we shall call Earl. My mother, whom we shall call Ace. My son, Jonathan. Myself.

The event: A concert in the park that my parents read about in the newspaper, and decided to invite us to attend. Basque dancing and bagpipes. One issue: It didn't start until after Jonathan's bedtime. I initially told Jonathan no, we weren't going. But then Earl talked it up so much, and got so excited about it, that Jonathan begged to go. So we went.

**** Excerpts from Earl ****

Earl (in the car): I'm not actually that excited about the dancing. It's too bad they have dancing first.

Earl (listening to announcements): They do this every Monday? Why haven't we come before? This is really neat.

Earl: I don't actually like bagpipes. Don't you think they all sound the same?

Earl (minutes later): Should we go now?

Earl (next song): Let's go. We should go.

Earl (next song): Let's get out of here.

Earl (next song): Let's go. Don't you think we should go?

Earl (while packing up at the end, speaking to unknown lady next to him): I hear they do this every week. Have you ever been to one of these before?

(Lady: Every week.)

Earl: Oh yeah? This is really neat. We should go every week, too.

Earl (lady has left, now packing up his chair): Bagpipe songs really all sound the same.

**** Excerpts from Ace ****

Ace (walking toward the park): Do you hear the bagpipes? Isn't this fun?

Ace (as we arrive, dancers are dancing to the melody of a whistle and drum): Are those the only instruments they use? It's going to get a little old.

(We watch the dancing for a while. They finish.)

Ace: Let's have the bagpipes now. It's time for the bagpipes.

(Pipe band arrives and starts playing a tune.)

Ace: Oh! I know this song! Hum hum hum hum... something about the moon. Oh it's too bad Daniel isn't here. He would know all the words... hum hum hum ... on the moon... hum hum.

(next song)

Ace: This song isn't very interesting. Why don't they play something more familiar?

(next song)

Ace: I wish they would play something familiar.

(next song)

Ace: Oh a march! This should be better.


Ace: I don't like this. Why don't they play something we know?

Ace: This isn't very pretty.


(Last song)

Ace: Oh this is more like it... hum hum hum... This is the one they played in that movie. Ooo this is really pretty. Hum hum hum. Isn't this nice? Hum hum hum.... It's too bad they didn't play more familiar songs the rest of the concert. Hum hum hum....

(Packing up afterwords)

Ace: Isn't this neat? Let's go next week. Won't it be fun?


Me (walking back toward the car when the event was over): Do you two ever listen to yourselves talk?


Artax said...

Oh, and I'm supposed to add that we ate our first blackberries this weekend, and our first Santa Rosa plum.

Letterpress said...

I think your comment is funny. I hate to think of my children evaluating my speech--their filters may be tuned to the absurd as well. For the record: I LOVE the bagpipes, and the whistles, and especially the drums and very especially if they do the twirl-the-baton thing in between the beats. I forced Dave to go to the Halifax Tattoo (2 1/2 hours of fun fun fun) when we were in Canada, and the only parts I liked was when the pipes and drums came out. It was fabulous. The rest was like watching a ward roadshow. The US contribution was horrid. (It's all on the blog). But those pipes. Those drums. I'd be in heaven. good for you for going; I'm sure it meant a lot to ACE and Earl, whoever they are.

Tiffany said...

I cannot begin to tell you how much and on how many levels I enjoyed this.